| www.rev4hire.com Ceremonies for Your Life |
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ELEMENTS OF A WEDDING CEREMONY
you want to simply say "yes" or "I do." Your wedding day is a time of
heightened emotions and if public speaking makes you nervous
under ordinary circumstances, then perhaps a step back from
memorization is apropos. Don't make it hard on yourself.
Another consideration is the role you wish friends and family to play.
Often the bridal couple will have a special poem, a Psalm, or simply a
letter that they wish to have read during the service. This is a
wonderful way to incorporate those who are dear to you as part of
the ceremony. I have performed weddings where half a dozen
guests each read a paragraph of a poem, where three close friends
each had a reading, and another where two musicians played songs
throughout the ceremony, alternating with the vows. It is all up to
you. It's your day.
Nearly every ceremony begins with a greeting to the assembled
guests. Even if there are only two as witnesses, it is appropriate to
welcome them. This section of the ceremony can be long or short,
depending on how much you have to say. I like to state the full name
of the bride, and the groom's full name as well, and I love the phrase
"united in holy matrimony," but that's just me.
If someone is escorting the bride, or the bridal couple, down the
aisle, this is the time I would identify them. "Who brings this woman
to be married to this man?" is a typical question. No one owns
another person, so no one is giving anyone away. I find it really
charming when the children escort the mom. I had one bride who's
92 year-old grandmother walked with her. What a great family
memory!
The next step can be a general statement about the meaning of
marriage or a poem or a prayer. A special song can be sung--
really anything you want.
The vows are often the next item. Vows are promises you make to
each other, promises you intend to keep. Don't promise the moon if
you aren't in the space program. Promise your heart and all is well.
This is the part of the ceremony where the bridal couple will often
say "I will." The vows do not have to be the same for each person.
The groom may prefer to phrase his words differently than the bride
and that's okay. As long as you are each comfortable with the
choices, that's what matters.
Prayers, Psalms, or poems are often the next order of business. If
you don't want any of these, you may like a general passage on
married life or sacred commitment. It is a time to use words to set a
tone for yourselves and for those who have gathered to witness the
solemnizing of your love.
If you plan to include wedding rings in the ceremony, you may wish
me to speak about the meaning of this ancient symbol. Once again,
it is not written in stone that you must have two rings. Have what you
are comfortable with, one or two or none.
Generally, there are vows spoken with the exchange of the rings.
These vows are somewhat different than the marriage vows, and can
be much simpler in format.
You can interject another prayer or reading here if you like.
Finally, there is the pronouncement. I will pronounce you husband
and wife. You have the choice to determine whether or not you
would like your names used here. I like to end the ceremony with the
words, "You may seal your vows with a kiss."
If you choose, I will introduce you to your guests as "Mr. and Mrs.
__", signalling the end of the ceremony, but this is often done during
the reception.
If you would like to add a wine ceremony or a unity candle, you
can add them at any point during the course of the ceremony. Keep
in mind how long you want to remain standing, the comfort of your
guests, and the tolerance of any small children in the wedding party.
The unity candle is often lit by two other tapers. The parents of the
bridal couple will often light the tapers, or friends representing each
partner. If the bride and groom have children, they can contribute to
the ceremony by lighting the candles. There are lots of ways to
incorporate children, this is just one of them.
If you have a wine ceremony, be sure to bring along a small light
bulb to crush instead of a wine glass. A sturdy napkin is also a must.
Several couples have also included a rose ceremony for
themselves, or roses on chairs in memory of family who have
passed on.
I have also done hand-fasting ceremonies and Native American
ceremonies. Be creative -- I'm ready!
Most importantly, have fun! This is your day and you will want to
remember it with delight!
The second set of navigation bars on the left will take you to a series
of pages with elements that many bridal couples like to include in
their ceremony. These pages are linked to each other and the
Home page, but not the entire site. You may also use your Back
button.
heightened emotions and if public speaking makes you nervous
under ordinary circumstances, then perhaps a step back from
memorization is apropos. Don't make it hard on yourself.
Another consideration is the role you wish friends and family to play.
Often the bridal couple will have a special poem, a Psalm, or simply a
letter that they wish to have read during the service. This is a
wonderful way to incorporate those who are dear to you as part of
the ceremony. I have performed weddings where half a dozen
guests each read a paragraph of a poem, where three close friends
each had a reading, and another where two musicians played songs
throughout the ceremony, alternating with the vows. It is all up to
you. It's your day.
Nearly every ceremony begins with a greeting to the assembled
guests. Even if there are only two as witnesses, it is appropriate to
welcome them. This section of the ceremony can be long or short,
depending on how much you have to say. I like to state the full name
of the bride, and the groom's full name as well, and I love the phrase
"united in holy matrimony," but that's just me.
If someone is escorting the bride, or the bridal couple, down the
aisle, this is the time I would identify them. "Who brings this woman
to be married to this man?" is a typical question. No one owns
another person, so no one is giving anyone away. I find it really
charming when the children escort the mom. I had one bride who's
92 year-old grandmother walked with her. What a great family
memory!
The next step can be a general statement about the meaning of
marriage or a poem or a prayer. A special song can be sung--
really anything you want.
The vows are often the next item. Vows are promises you make to
each other, promises you intend to keep. Don't promise the moon if
you aren't in the space program. Promise your heart and all is well.
This is the part of the ceremony where the bridal couple will often
say "I will." The vows do not have to be the same for each person.
The groom may prefer to phrase his words differently than the bride
and that's okay. As long as you are each comfortable with the
choices, that's what matters.
Prayers, Psalms, or poems are often the next order of business. If
you don't want any of these, you may like a general passage on
married life or sacred commitment. It is a time to use words to set a
tone for yourselves and for those who have gathered to witness the
solemnizing of your love.
If you plan to include wedding rings in the ceremony, you may wish
me to speak about the meaning of this ancient symbol. Once again,
it is not written in stone that you must have two rings. Have what you
are comfortable with, one or two or none.
Generally, there are vows spoken with the exchange of the rings.
These vows are somewhat different than the marriage vows, and can
be much simpler in format.
You can interject another prayer or reading here if you like.
Finally, there is the pronouncement. I will pronounce you husband
and wife. You have the choice to determine whether or not you
would like your names used here. I like to end the ceremony with the
words, "You may seal your vows with a kiss."
If you choose, I will introduce you to your guests as "Mr. and Mrs.
__", signalling the end of the ceremony, but this is often done during
the reception.
If you would like to add a wine ceremony or a unity candle, you
can add them at any point during the course of the ceremony. Keep
in mind how long you want to remain standing, the comfort of your
guests, and the tolerance of any small children in the wedding party.
The unity candle is often lit by two other tapers. The parents of the
bridal couple will often light the tapers, or friends representing each
partner. If the bride and groom have children, they can contribute to
the ceremony by lighting the candles. There are lots of ways to
incorporate children, this is just one of them.
If you have a wine ceremony, be sure to bring along a small light
bulb to crush instead of a wine glass. A sturdy napkin is also a must.
Several couples have also included a rose ceremony for
themselves, or roses on chairs in memory of family who have
passed on.
I have also done hand-fasting ceremonies and Native American
ceremonies. Be creative -- I'm ready!
Most importantly, have fun! This is your day and you will want to
remember it with delight!
The second set of navigation bars on the left will take you to a series
of pages with elements that many bridal couples like to include in
their ceremony. These pages are linked to each other and the
Home page, but not the entire site. You may also use your Back
button.
 |
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 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
| |
 |
A wedding ceremony should reflect who you are, separately and as a couple,
the commitment you have to each other and perhaps even where you want to
take the relationship. As such, it is a very personal statement. All that is
really needed to make your marriage legal is for the two of you to agree to be
married and for someone in authority to file the paperwork. The rest of the
ceremony is for the benefit of your hearts, your minds and the sharing of your
joy with those you love.
I usually ask the couples I work with to determine in advance the level of
spirituality they would like in their ceremony. Some want none at all, others
don't mind if God is mentioned, some couples like a prayer or two, and others
would like a ceremony that would be comparable to a church service. If a
larger church wedding is planned for later, the couple will often opt for a
ceremony with no spiritual elements the first time around. It is all a matter of
choice.
One of the things you will want to consider when putting together the various
parts of the ceremony is how comfortable you are with public speaking. Think
about whether you are at ease memorizing a sentence or a paragraph, or if
the commitment you have to each other and perhaps even where you want to
take the relationship. As such, it is a very personal statement. All that is
really needed to make your marriage legal is for the two of you to agree to be
married and for someone in authority to file the paperwork. The rest of the
ceremony is for the benefit of your hearts, your minds and the sharing of your
joy with those you love.
I usually ask the couples I work with to determine in advance the level of
spirituality they would like in their ceremony. Some want none at all, others
don't mind if God is mentioned, some couples like a prayer or two, and others
would like a ceremony that would be comparable to a church service. If a
larger church wedding is planned for later, the couple will often opt for a
ceremony with no spiritual elements the first time around. It is all a matter of
choice.
One of the things you will want to consider when putting together the various
parts of the ceremony is how comfortable you are with public speaking. Think
about whether you are at ease memorizing a sentence or a paragraph, or if